デート

初デートを成功させる準備やマナーとは？

あなたは今、恋をしていますか？

恋愛はあなたを輝かせる甘酸っぱいサプリメント。素敵な恋愛は、あなたの心の糧となり人生を豊かに彩ってくれることでしょう。

恋愛ファーストステージの第1関門、それは「初デート」。

「好きな人との距離を、もっと縮めたい！」
「気になる人のことを、もっと知りたい！」
「自分のことを、もっと好きになってほしい！」

世界中の男女は、「相手のことをもっと知りたい！自分のことを知ってほしい！」想いで、気になる異性をデートに誘うのです。

しかし、、、頭の中にはいろいろな不安がよぎりますね。

「どこに行けばいいんだろう？」
「会話が途切れたらどうしよう？」
「何を着ていけばいいの？」

初デートを具体的にシュミレーションすることで、あなたの不安を少しでも解消します。

初デートを成功させるコツ

初デートを成功させるコツ

初デートを成功させるコツは、会話が途切れたらさりげなく相手を褒めることです。会話が途切れたら、相手の良いところを見つけて、さりげなく褒めてみましょう。

自分が認めてもらったことに安心感を抱き、リラックスした雰囲気を作ることができます。では実際、何をどのように褒めたら良いでしょうか？

見た目を褒める

「可愛いね」「綺麗だね」「おしゃれだね」「かっこいいね」と言われて嫌な人はいません。漠然と褒めるのも悪くありません。

でも、「ネイルアート可愛いね」と褒めた後に「自分でやったの？」と褒め＋質問で会話を盛り上げていくこともできます。

間接的に褒める

「ここのお店、素敵だね。お店選びのセンスがいいね！」
「映画面白かったね。映画について詳しくてすごいね」など、相手の選んだものを褒めることで、間接的に相手を褒めることもできますね。

褒め＋質問で「このお店は前に来たことがあるの？」や「他にオススメの映画はある？」などでどんどん会話を盛り上げましょう。

夢中になっていることを褒める

話の内容を褒める。会話の中で、何か打ち込んでいることや夢中になっていることについて褒めてみましょう。

「勉強頑張っているんだね。尊敬するよ」
「仕事に打ち込んでいる姿、かっこいいね」など。

「ありがとう」＋褒め言葉

相手の親切や気遣いに対する感謝の言葉と一緒に「優しいね」「気が利くね」などの「褒め言葉」をプラスしましょう。会話に盛り込むことで、相手への好意を表現できます。

初デートで失敗を防ぐ６つ方法とは？

2019年9月27日

初デートの失敗しやすいポイントは？

2019年9月24日

初デートの目的って何？

初デートの目的

そもそも初デートの目的は何でしょうか？

相互理解

お互いのことをより深く知り、相手に自分のことを知ってもらうためです。そのためには会話が重要です。

自分のことを理解してもらうことも重要ですが、聞き手に回るくらいの意識で相手に質問をして会話を広げていくと良いです。

相手に楽しんでもらう

相手にも楽しんでもらうためにはデートコース選びが重要になってきますね。自分も相手も無理せずに楽しめるようなプランを考えたいものです。

2回目以降のデートに繋げる

お互いに「もっと一緒にいたいな」「また会いたいな」と思えるような初デートが理想ですよね。そのためには、「心地よい距離感」「リラックスした雰囲気」作りがとても大切です。

初デートが恋の始まり！重要な理由とは

初デートが恋の始まり

2度目のデートに繋げるには、初デートの成功が必須になります。

好印象を与えましょう

「なかなか恋が進展しない」と悩む人は、2度目のデートに繋がらない場合が多いようです。「もう一度会いたい」と思ってもらうためには、初デートでの良い印象を持ってもらうことが重要です。

初デートの印象が良ければ、2度目のデートにつながる可能性もグッと高まります。では、好印象を与えるためにはどうすれば良いのでしょうか？

笑顔でリラックス

どんな時も笑顔。相手が楽しそうに笑っていれば、自然と安心してリラックスできるものです。たとえ会話が途切れてしまっても、相手が笑顔でいる姿を見るとリラックスした気持ちになるものです。

顔が笑顔になると、自然と声のトーンも高く明るく元気になっていきます。視覚的にも聴覚的にも好印象を与えることができます。

初デート後の連絡はどうすればいいの？

2019年7月31日

初デート後に「また会いたい！」と思わせるメール内容とは？

2019年7月24日

初デートを成功に導くには？
初デートを成功に導く

リラックスした雰囲気作りを心がける

相手に楽しんでもらおうという姿勢が伝わると、印象は自然と良くなるものです。逆に、つまらなそうな表情や悪口、愚痴は、印象を悪くしてしまいます。

例えば、レストランで料理が美味しくなかったら、あなたならどうしますか？

あからさまに料理の文句を言って、がっかりした表情を見せてはいけません。せっかくの食事の雰囲気を悪くしてしまうだけなので避けたいところです。

それよりも、「ねぇねぇ。この料理、少し変わった味がするんだけど味見してみない？」など、「楽しい会話のネタ」に変換してしまいましょう。

二人の時間を楽しもうとする姿勢が相手に好印象を与えるのです。ピンチはチャンス！ネガティブな要素をポジティブに楽しめるようになりましょう。

相手を不安にさせないように思いやる

二人でいる時にスマホに夢中にならないように気をつけましょう。せっかく二人で過ごしていても、相手がスマホの画面に釘付けになっていると「つまらないのかな？」と不安になるものです。

どうしても、すぐに返信しなくてはならない場合には、相手に大事な用事であることを説明して、安心させてあげるなどの気遣いが必要ですね。

初デートを成功させるために事前にできること

初デートを成功させるための事前準備

初デート前にさらに距離を縮めましょう。LINEなどで文字だけのやり取りしていた相手と、二人きりで会うと思うと、少し緊張してしまいますよね。

初デート前の全てのやり取りをLINEなど文字のやり取りで済ませてしまっていませんか？

電話で心の準備

前日に「明日の待ち合わせは〇〇〇ね。場所は大丈夫？」など軽い内容の電話を掛けてみてはいかがですか？相手との距離を縮めるのと同時に、自分の中でも心の準備をすることができます。

電話では相手の声のトーンや話し方から、自分のことを好きかどうか予想することができるというメリットもあります。

「好きな人の前では緊張してパニックになってしまう！」という人には、この電話療法でハードルを下げてから会う方法がオススメです。

【服装】初デートで好かれる服装とは

初デートで好かれる服装

【女性向け】初デートファッション

事前のリサーチが成功の鍵を握ります。彼の好きなファッションは、事前にリサーチしておきたいところです。

さらに、デートコースも「どのあたりに行くのか？」をリサーチして「どんなことをするのか？」見当をつけてTPOに会った服装を選びたいです。

せっかくお気に入りのハイヒールを履いて行ったのに、山や海など、まさかのアウトドアデートではないとも限りません。

そんなことにならないよう「どのあたりに行くのかな？」と事前に訊いておくと安心ですね。

初デートのドキドキを演出するためのキーワードは「色っぽフェミニンアレンジ」“おフェロメイク”や”おくれ毛ヘアアレンジ”です。頑張りすぎない自然な色気を目指しましょう。

「ゆるふわ好きな彼」とのデートの場合には、透け感のある柔らかい素材でのフェニミンアピールが有効。相手の男性の身長が自分より低い場合には、ヒールの低い靴を選ぶ気遣いがあると良いです。

彼がアウトドアなデートコースを提案してきた場合はカジュアルなコーディネートが無難ですね。

「遊園地やハイキングにハイヒールを履いて行ったため、地獄のようだった…」ということのないように靴選びは慎重にしましょう。

また、スニーカーメインのカジュアルコーデの場合には、オフショルダーを取り入れたさりげない”肌見せ”が有効です。

ヘアアレンジは、毛先を巻いてみるなどフェミニンさをプラスするなど、全体をバランス良く仕上げましょう。

初デートで喜ばれる持ち物は？

2019年9月26日

【場所】初デートで失敗しない場所選びとは

初デートに最適な場所選び

二人で楽しむことを目的としたデートコースを考えましょう。定番は「映画館デート」「遊園地デート」です。

会話が苦手な方にオススメ「映画館デート」

２時間くらい映画に集中するので、苦手な会話に苦戦する時間を短縮させることができますね。また、映画を見た後に共通の話題で話をすることができることも大きなメリットです。

ただ、気をつけたいのがどの映画を見るかということ。映画の評判はもちろん、映画館の周辺の雰囲気など事前のリサーチが成功を左右すると言ってよいでしょう。

相手の好みを考慮した作品選びがとても重要です。

初デートで映画はあり？なし？

2019年8月25日

初デートで見るべき映画のジャンルとは？

2019年9月25日

楽しく遊ぶなら、やっぱり「遊園地デート」

非日常的な空間で、いろいろなアトラクションを一緒に楽しむ遊園地デートは初デートにぴったりです。アトラクションの待ち時間を楽しく過ごすことができれば、二人の距離もグッと縮まるはず。

デートコース選びで気をつけたいこと

遊園地、アウトドアなどスニーカーの方が楽しめるときに、初デートで女性は少なからずおしゃれに気合を入れるものです。お気に入りのハイヒールを履いてくるかもしれません。

その場合、遊園地など1日中歩き続けるのは、過酷なものとなってしまい、楽しめなくなってしまう可能性すらあります。

「おしゃれは気合い！」と頑張っている女子ですが、たくさん歩く場合は、あらかじめ男性から伝えておくことが優しさかもしれません。

当日まで「どこに行くのか秘密にしてサプライズを演出したい」という場合も、服選びのヒントは教えてあげて欲しいところです。

初デート場所で失敗しないためには？

2019年8月8日

【食事】初デートで気をつけるマナーとは

初デートで気をつけるマナー

高級料亭でなくても、最低限の食事のマナーはどこでも必要です。

姿勢を正す

どんな料理の場合でも、姿勢が悪いと食べている姿が綺麗に見えません。背筋をすっと伸ばすことはもちろん、一つ一つの動作をゆっくり行うとより上品に美しく見えますよ。

音を立てて食べない

食べる時の「くちゃくちゃ」という音は男女ともにかなりのマイナスポイントとなります。普段の生活から意識して、口を閉じて音を立てないように、美しく食事する習慣を身につけましょう。

避けた方が無難

高価な食事をご馳走してあげたいという気持ちは、逆に相手に気を遣わせてしまうこともあります。ムード満点のロマンチックな場所や高級レストランは、付き合ってからのお楽しみにとっておきましょう。

あなたがロマンチックな演出をやりきることができる自信があれば別ですが、初デートでは純粋に二人で楽しめるカジュアルな場所選びましょう。

初デートの食事はランチ？ディナー？

2019年9月26日

【コミュニケーション】初デートを成功させる会話とは

初デートを成功させるコミュニケーション

オープンクエスチョンとクローズドクエスチョン

質問とは奥が深いものです。大きく分けて２種類の質問方法があるのをご存知ですか？

① 食事は何を食べたい？」という質問は、相手が自由に回答できる質問方法です。オープンクエスチョンと呼ばれています。
② 「中華とイタリアンどっちがいい？」という質問は、相手は与えられた選択肢の中から回答を選ぶことになります。限定された選択肢から選ぶ問いをクローズドクエスチョンと言います。

デートの場所を選ぶ時も「どこに行きたい？」と聞かれるよりも、「映画館と遊園地ならどっちに行きたい？」と選択肢を提供してもらった方が答えやすいものです。

小さなことなのですが”相手を思いやる優しさ”というのはこういうところにあらわれてくるものではないでしょうか？

せっかく答えてくれた相手の回答には興味を持ってリアクションして、深く掘り下げていくように意識して会話を盛り上げましょう。

初デートの会話はどうすればいい？

2019年7月24日

初デートで盛り上がる１０の話題とは？

2019年7月25日

初デートでも、自分らしさを忘れずに

初デートでも大切な自分らしさ

恋愛テクニックのノウハウをいろいろと詰め込んでいくと「自分らしさ」「ありのままの自分」を見失ってしまうことがあります。

相手に良く思われたいと思うあまりに、理想の自分を演じてしまっていませんか？初デートという現実に「理想の自分」を持ち込んで演技をしてしまうことはオススメできません。

背伸びするなど、無理をして取り繕うような恋愛は、空回りしてしまい苦しいものです。「ありのままの自分」を好きになってくれる人が、きっといると信じて前向きに恋愛を楽しみたいですね。

あなたの初デートが、あなた自身を輝かせて、人間として成長できるような、そんな素敵な経験になりますように。

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